will a person stop trying?

trying. i have sighed deep for that word lately.

can a person survive without trying? i would say that most of you dear readers will say yes for the statement that i had just given to you guys. we were urge to try for the best of us bla bla bla (encouragement statement yadi yadi yada) because well i don't know what to describe because at this point i think i want to stop trying and also trying to be happy if literally i don't even felt so.

what is for to pretend something that you actually kept inside you for the sake of people will you as havoc and bubbly than anybody else because it is fucking pathetic. (woops!)

but yeah, frankly i think that trying to hard for something that you had been trying for aaageeessss should be stopped and start with something else. ditch it th old one. but what the heck. you ditch the old one but u gain a NEW WHOLE OF SET in the term 'trying'. like what was that supposed to mean. say that you want a new life but yet you keep on doing the verb the so-called 'precious' word because you know what 

It ain't work that way!!

yeah yeah yeah. it should be something encouraging and mind-opening something-something here eventually it is ain't happening yet this is the bad side of me when i have felt soooooooo fed-up with the thing that i've tried. i don't actually get it what i wrote earlier but i know its a twisted words but i think you'll get what i mean and the main point is i'm frustrating facing here is

HOW CAN A PERSON IS TO BE HAPPY WHEN ALL THE HAPPINESS HE'S TRYING TO CONCEALED ACTUALLY NEVER EXIST!? 

In the other hand, i personally think that us as human being cannot run away from the word TRYING. yeah, i need to get a grip of thing actually. what i say up there is actually to perish all of the blocked feeling inside me the negative thought i've bared for quite a long time since many heart breaking event happen this past few months and i bet that my new year post will be every exposing that cannot be eradicate yes completely.

so as of tonight, I MUST YES AGAIN "TRY". TRYING TRYING TRYING. TO GAIN HAPPINESS, SUCCESS, MONEY, POWER. HURGHH.. it fluctuate form what i want in the real path but i must stressed on the capitalized letter. but at some point i feel that getting away from people and try to stand on my own feet. what i mean is to let people find for you not you the one finding people although it might sound egoistic but be the man you know you can be and stop giving hints Mr. AwalKhamis!