i sighed deeply

last night was something good and bad to me.

first thing first i will write as clear as possible for you people to understand. the reason i say it here because i want people to share the experience and also idea about what am i thinking. but the real thing that almost everyone having reading what am i saying is my motives. well i don't care much if you did not understand because i had try my best.

back to the story.

i went with my buddies yesterday. hanging out at Starbucks happy hour promotions. there are six of us but the other to went to purchase something. then i sit at a very comfortable fluffy chair and starts opening facebook and twitter just to release my tension and put myself straight. it was good at first half of the outing. then the no-so-good part came when we went for a karaoke session. we sang 24 songs and i paid most of the charges. until it come to one song that i sang. at first i only just want to sing the song because i really like that song. but until the middle part of the song it broke me apart and tear me down. i went into an emotional breakdown.

the thing is i went out with my crush in groupies of course. she ask me if i'm okay. and i told him what bothers me. later that night after we barely make it into the campus. i bbm-ed her saying that i really had a great night blablabla then all of a sudden i realize that we had gone into a really deep conversation. she asked me almost everything about me. also she always keep on mentioning that she's sick with guys that always being sweet and nice at first and such an asshole later on. i explained myself and give a view on the matter i can't help to agree with what she said about man because i know how man functions it almost typically the same. but in that typical group 3 out of 10 is the perfect guy. she just need to not to jump into conclusion very fast. meanwhile i to explain a little bit about myself to clear her perceptions on me. her perception is not that differ from other people.

"awal, you treat all women the same and there is nothing will be special to your girlfriend"

is it a crime for a guy like me to treat a women nice most of the time? i'm just working with the order of life. women should be treated nicely. i have things when it comes into treating ladies as they should be. am i the guy that badly mistreated women? i just can't seems to understand.