thing were out of my mind...

it gonna be simple and short after 2 days i did not update my kedai kopi..

a couple days before this was a very stressful and disappointing weeks.. and my dream did come true last night.. ' it was a storm that crash on my boat '.. that is how i put it in an unclear statement..

it very a big disappointment for me to create stuff that i was not supposed to do.. and from it i dragged innocent people.. and i've cleared everything this evening and i hope that was it.. no more... i'm sick of it... i dont want to be in a depression mode anymore... i want to overwhelm that sickness..

i just could not simply become depress and do something that is inappropriate..

i finally realized that from the tears i've shed by myself and other that i truly love and care is now a valueable thing.. and by this instance i've made up my mind to think in a new perspective.. if i was a skeptical person and its about time i changed that.. i love you guys so much.. but it was my way of loving u guys that needs to be understand by u guys.. because someone used to say to me...

'people wont changed.. and if u do not changed urself how are u gonna changed the people towards you..'

it seems simple and irrevocably twisting..  but after u read it and understand the true sentence.. u will discover something that is might be useful to ur life someday.. this word to day had changed my way of life.. many words today did affect me right now.. im thinking with the words that is given out to me today like..

' do not create a problem that will effect peoples way of thinking.. '

' do not put to many WHY in ur pathetic and absurd questions because 'someone' else will anwser it 4 u '

' try to think on the consequence on ur behaviour.. '

' do not let ur old mind set put u out '

' just think that this matter is a small black dot on a large piece of paper.. because u can cover it up.. '

the most important words that i've learned today is..

' WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH U WHEN EVERYTHING WAS JUST FINE!! '

and

' JANGAN BIARKAN BENDA KECIK HANCURKAN BENDA YANG DAH SEDIA KUKUH '

what i want rite now is that i will say thing directly.. THIS IS MY OATH.. i will say things the same to the person that i should tell earlier with the person that i am telling stuff of that person... it seems confusing.. but if really understand what am i trying to say.. u'll know what i mean..

so now as a remedy for myself i set a new perspective that i will be much better with YOU..  YOU.. and YOU.. im done with saying im sorry but keep repeating the same thing over and over again..

i read this on one of my friends profile in fb..

' though life seems unfair but i love my companion.. '

i love it and i wanna live with it.. and i hope that u will call me 'angah' all the time anytime anywhere.. and im begging you to do so.. im asking it from u..

i will understand u the way u understand me..

i will not be selfish to just think of myself.. i'll try..

I also hoped that u read this and it will clear a few thing from ur head..